PTSD and WORLD ON FIRE

The Spirit is a Fire. It takes form, it flames up, casts its sparkles and light, then gutters out, and another life ends. The Fire consumes Its own forms like bundles of kindling, called skandhas, or gunas. Over and over and over again, time unending.

Remember the show This Is Your Life? Well, this was your life. Take a look back, embrace your journey. Did you graduate?

Home Farm was once an incubator for little spirits, where a “Pappy” was surrounded by his chicks. Some grew up enough to leave the nest. Others, no so much.

When he died, the little family so DEPENDENT on his holding the center, they went into shock. PTSD we now recognize as the depression that follows such a loss, when you lose part of yourself and lose hope that everything will one day be “all right.”

Pappy's work was to "cook the baby frogs" with the heat of his darshan. To gently precipitate the psychic cleansing process. And then to neutralize the scummy psychic foam that arose. After he left, the scum began to accumulate, and the collective negativity began to accumulate until Dark Forces have subsumed the Light. One might bemoan that the Darkness has suffocated the Light, but this is nonetheless "natural order." Age and reactionary behavior is the end to all organic forms. The Spirit moves on, reborn anew where there are open hearts, time unending.

The decline at Home Farm was inevitable. We have reached the bottom. Those who could not do the inner Work on themselves never left the nest, and lost the Light, which is to honor the Spirit in each and every unique one who came their way. They’ve settled for the fake “harmony” of appearances, and the cult-like repetition of dead words. They lost what Way they had. This is NOT “making the School safe” or “protecting the teachings” as they say; it is in fact, the DEATH of the Teaching.

Home Farm has now gone negative. It serves no further purpose except as an act of obstruction to test if you, as a student who came there, can find your own center, and learn to stand on your own. THIS was the essence of what Ralph taught: to find the One Who Knows in yourself, the Vitvan IN YOU.

Even in this we can be thankful for those whose role it was to oppress us, for they forced us to take a hard look at our puerile hopes for finding "safety" within a Kumbaya Club or Vitvan Cult. We have to grow up and graduate.

Even now I see those who could no longer in honesty support the sham at Home Farm, I see they still suffer from PTSD. We feel that something we had believed in, had pinned our hopes on, is no longer really there, and we cannot pretend any longer. We carry a sadness with us, even in exile.

I did a casual interview of students recently and found that most of us grew up with some kind of broken family situation. From one angle we have all been looking for our missing “good” Mommy or Daddy. Then we found this in Pappy. He trained us in how the Process works; he hoped to matriculate a few. We can’t keep living in Pappy’s House. He wanted us, those who could take a look deeper into our PTSD, to work through it, recover the Light within, and then carry on. This is the Cathartic Process so few enter into.

It may be also true, at the cross-over time between the Old Cycle and the Incoming, that those of us who fought through our PTSD to remember, recover, and love our true selves, that we came to Pappy’s School of Hard Knocks to use the negativity there to bring up and clear out our karmic leftovers. TRUE harmony comes from being psychically cleansed, which comes after the courage of the First Crossing, dealing with your lost Shadow self. FAKE harmony, which reigns at Bizarro Home Farm, is suppressing your emotions, and paving over the truth of your inner wounds with cutesy sayings and denial, substituting the empty spiritual calories of repetition and ritual for real spiritual food.

If you made it this far, be thankful you made it through. Let go of the sham. You made it! All forms must pass. If you can now let it go and be your own center, your own positive power without looking for some “leader” or “Pappy,” then see this for what it is! The Teaching worked in YOU. Ralph would be happy. His seeds found a few. Many were planted and watered; a few picked up the ball and understand. Let go your PTSD.

The cancer that grew at Home Farm has metastasized. Those who are the most damaged and who cannot/will not do the inner Work on themselves are in the driver's seat.  It’s OK to let it go, to let it die. It came from the Old Cycle and should be buried with it. The old and non-functional will be swept away by the Fire.

End of Cycle grade for SNO: basic Perennial Wisdom, good updated maps with descriptions; no decent working inner technology, no Sacred Communion Meal of any potency. Another fading historical footnote.

Learn the Teaching by living the Teaching.

p.s. personally, I am tired of those who come by to encourage me to write more, or keep at it, yet never do they come out of the shadows and speak out against the abuse. They play the "long game" they say; they never comment publicly or show support.

 It's up to you if you want to let the shit keep sticking to you.